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Reflections

2020 is here. It’s a new decade. I’m turning 18 this year. I’m starting my second semester as a fresher. And I’m ready to rock this year, #blowyourmind. But then again there’s no 2020 without 2019. Last year, a day ago was truly an amazing one for me, a rollercoaster ride. Lots of ups and downs but time and time again I leaned to smile. I found joy in the Lord and stopped relying on happiness that came from ephemeral entities.

Wrote a lot of exams, had a lot of anxieties. Made mistakes, grew, backslided even. Got emotionally unstable. Had my breakthroughs. Moved into a new apartment. Got into university. Paid for my post-utme exam by winning an inter-denominational bible quiz competition. Forfeited stuff. Dealt with heartbreak. Stayed strong. Broke down and got lost. Cried a lot. Prayed some more. Said goodbye to high school still flying high.

Helped organized a jamb seminar that helped thousands of students in Delta state. More mentoring. Was part of a team, something bigger. Incubated in GirlFoundation, interacted with female stars. Wrote an essay, and another. Applied for opportunities online. Begged God to let me get it. Didn’t get it. More heartbreaks. Stayed strong. Kept writing. Grew my social media presence. Struggled yet again with being comfortable in my skin. Wore a backless dress to graduation. Slayed matriculation. Looked in the mirror then Instagram and at once remembered 13-year-old me waking up one morning and scratching her face. Hate it. Love it.

Formed new relationships. Let some die off. New friends, some drama. A sprinkle of confusion and irritation here and there. Read novels, stories, articles, essays, so many of them. Kept the grind going. Got a new gig. Ended this year by being considered a campus ambassador for a company out of 500 applicants. Fit in. Stood out. Found my crew. Felt misplaced sometimes. Discovered new dimensions of the Lord. Joined a unit at church early last year. Broke out of my cocoon. Fell in love with drama unit. Served the Lord.

First taste of university. Addiction for
learning still intact. Things I could have done better. Things I did better than expected. Joined Prayerband at uni. New experiences with the Lord. Better definitions of my life. Loved more than ever. Pushed myself to the forefront. Played sports. Got a highlight at the volleyball contest between Freshers and Returning students. Expected to fail. Had a team of star players instead. Star player. Freshers won.

Joined the Debate society. Got more reasons to write. Learnt a lot. Heard a lot. New bonds were made. Ate tofu for the first time. Lived without meat, chicken or fish. Patronized D block shawarma. Had the best roommates. Went to church more times in a week than ever. Came back home. After years. Learnt more about my roots. Appreciate my mum for being the best. Understood the significance of family.

I’ve grown. And apparently I’m a fresher. Sorry for the rambling. Happy new year.


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